Holidays are a time of excitement, celebration, and gatherings with family and friends. For children with autism, however, this time of year can also be full of new, uncomfortable, and overwhelming experiences caused by anything from unusual food to large groups of people, loud noises, and disruptions to their ordinary schedule. If you are still early in the process of understanding your child’s needs, autism testing can help clarify supports and next steps.
Whatever your plans are for the holiday season, each comes with a unique set of challenges when a child with autism is present. If you plan to travel, your child may encounter difficult and constraining environments in a car, plane, airport, or an unfamiliar home, and you may feel unprepared if your child reacts strongly or has an emergency. While it may be simpler in some ways, hosting holiday celebrations at home also involves its own challenges as you try to balance the roles of host and caretaker. Many families find it helpful to review common questions about autism supports and planning.
Below you’ll find some quick tips and considerations to help prepare for celebrating the holiday season with a family member who may have specialized behavioral or emotional needs.
Preparing for the Holidays
For children with autism, preparation can be the difference between a highly stressful holiday gathering and a peaceful one. You can get your child used to the idea of the celebration with visual presentations of what the gathering will look like, including pictures of family members, locations, and activities, alongside repeated verbal explanations of what’s involved. You might also try putting the event on the calendar and helping your child mark the days before it arrives to help prepare them for the day.
It’s often a good idea to connect in advance with friends and family members that you plan to spend time with over the holidays. This gives you a chance to explain your child’s needs and discuss potential triggers such as loud noises, unfamiliar faces, large gatherings, or strong smells. If your child is non-verbal, it may be helpful to mention this ahead of time so expectations are clear. For many families, strategies taught in ABA therapy can be useful for planning routines, expectations, and coping skills around big events.
If your child reacts strongly to unfamiliar people, scheduling video calls with loved ones in advance can help your child become accustomed to their faces and voices, potentially reducing anxiety when meeting in person.
Hosting the Holidays
Why Host?
Many families with a child who has autism prefer to host holiday celebrations. Travel can be highly stressful due to unpredictable sensory stimuli and unfamiliar environments. Hosting at home allows for greater control over the schedule, food, activities, and access to comforting objects, helping avoid many uncomfortable situations.
What to Remember When Hosting
The key to hosting a successful holiday gathering is ensuring someone can always prioritize your child’s needs. Sharing responsibilities among multiple adults ensures that if an emergency arises, someone is available to help—whether that means moving to a quiet room, preparing food, or offering a calming activity.
You may wish to ask guests to bring most of the food and drinks so you are not overwhelmed. Be sure to notify guests of any allergies or dietary restrictions. If feeding is a primary stressor, some families benefit from coordinated support such as speech and occupational therapy (including feeding therapy when appropriate).
It’s also helpful to establish an “escape plan” in advance. Designate a quiet room or safe space where your child can retreat if things become overwhelming.
Visiting for the Holidays
Traveling during the holidays can be especially challenging for children with autism due to disruptions in routine and increased sensory input—particularly when flying. Familiar foods, objects, and activities may be harder to access, increasing stress for both child and caregiver.
For more detailed guidance, check out our article on 7 Travel Tips for a Child with Autism.
If possible, visiting the location ahead of time can help identify challenges and calming resources. As with hosting, it’s important to have an escape plan and identify activities or objects that help your child feel comfortable.
Communicating with the host in advance is essential. Ask about the number of guests, food options, and general schedule so you can plan accordingly—especially if your child has strict eating or napping routines.
Once you have an outline of events, prepare what your child may need, including preferred foods, toys, tablets, blankets, and a plan for meals and rest breaks. If you are considering a comprehensive care setting that supports skill-building and routines, a full-service center can be helpful for some families.
Summary
While holidays are meant to be times of peace and joy, celebrating with a child with autism often requires additional preparation. With thoughtful planning, minimizing uncertainty, and managing expectations, a stress-free holiday experience is entirely possible.
Being realistic with yourself, your child, and others helps you prepare for any situation and respond calmly when challenges arise. Knowing you are prepared can bring the peace of mind that the holidays are meant to provide. To understand how progress is measured and how care teams adjust supports over time, see Ally’s clinical excellence approach.